Tuscany is so picturesque. Rolling hills, stone walls, rustic houses... I could really just breathe it all in.

I wish there was still some mystery left in the world. Something untouched, blossoming in forbidden light. But the world is shrinking, some parts dying. I'm wasting my time here, doing nothing, going to school, living in concrete walls built by machines. Its just not real.

I wish I could be like Thoreau, or Jack London. You know, just be inspired by life in its most basic form. Be like Chris McCandless and live in Alaska. Something like that, instead of 'living' here in Singapore. It really makes no sense.

Think about it. My main goal now is to do well in the 'O' levels. After that, its the 'A' levels. Let's just say I did amazingly well in both of them, then what? I go to college, so when I'm in, say, my mid twenties, I'll be out of school for good. Then I'll go and get a job in Journalism, and then for the rest of my life, that's what I'm going to do. I'll work for the rest of my life, paying bills and buying stuff, and then I'll retire. I'll be all old and wrinkly and frail, and I'll be doing lame stuff like traveling around the world, never once stepping out of the tour bus. I'll take my final breath in a hospital, lying on a mattress with a beeping sound in the background. And then that's it. The end.

Not very enticing. But what can I do about it?

Just riding the river of society, always traveling with the current, until I reach the waterfall and then there is nothing I can do to stop my boat.

I'm caged.

Help. Help. Help.

Let me out.

Did you know?

Rain is so beautiful.

As high as the moon, so high were my spirits, when you sang out my name.

3 lousy points.

That's all it takes.

The world isn't going to stay the same for long.
But how long must I wait til society lets me enjoy it?

FRICK YOU, YO.

These few days have been hard.
Painful.

Why?

My stupid headache.

I just woke up one day and felt just extremely dizzy. The dizziness evolved into headache that lasted the entire day, and I had to endure lessons with that disgusting pain in my head. I went home and waited 50 min to see the doctor, who told me to drink more water and sleep more. She gave me a muscle relaxant (for a headache? Hmmm...) and I took a nap to let the medicine kick in. Then I went to study geography.
The next day, it was a little better, but towards the end of the day, the prodigal headache returned. I had to skip CCA and went back home to sleep for like 2 hours.
It's the weekends now, but the headache is still lingering. I can't really focus when I'm studying, which is horrible. I can't even read.
I'm praying that its just because of the weather or something, and that it will go away on Monday, or else school is gonna be torture.
Oh, and apparently, I got this from my mother's side of the family. Figures. She gave me asthma too, you know. Ah, well.

Down to the wire, I wanted water but I'll walk through the fire, if that is what it takes to take me even higher, then I come through like I do when the world keeps testing me, testing me, testing me...

There are just some times. Some things.

That don't do well.

Click

Oblong.

Cluttered.

Epiphany.

Acceptance?/Denial?

Or click?

Focus...talent?

Or perseverance?

Answers, opinions, don't do well.

Gut.

Strange things happen, but always for a reason. Rain falls, washes dirt away. But some stains don't go out--they stick. They irritate. They hinder.

They hinder.

Or perhaps its just a phase.

Perhaps?

Or should I be thinking of Zhihuatanejo?

Paradise?

Delight/Sorrow.

Can I deal with this?

Its ME. Mine.

Whatever the outcome, we'll learn...

It should not affect...

Let's just get through...

Its obvious sometimes. Its not Mine.